I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?