i jhust puked up my retainher.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.