It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
