i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize