I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
True but thats because hes a fetus.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Randomize
