i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
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