either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Randomize
