you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Randomize