Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...