Texts From Last Night

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  (517): View more from Michigan

  I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.

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  (517): I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie. http://tfl.nu/vu4d
  Replies (7) Good night (1427) Bad night (577)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?

  (847): View more from Illinois

  haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.

  (217): View more from Illinois

  ... oops

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  (217): I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity? (847): haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that. (217): ... oops http://tfl.nu/gsy7
  Replies (4) Good night (1245) Bad night (543)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...

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  (250): note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex... http://tfl.nu/vx0w
  Replies (51) Good night (818) Bad night (5658)
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  (607): View more from New York

  he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.

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  (607): he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom. http://tfl.nu/mpyr
  Replies (21) Good night (1066) Bad night (4097)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.

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  (561): I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down. http://tfl.nu/sm69
  Replies (3) Good night (2307) Bad night (940)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did

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  (732): 90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did http://tfl.nu/76ya
  Replies (9) Good night (2634) Bad night (1183)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"

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  (978): You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!" http://tfl.nu/193a
  Replies (3) Good night (1986) Bad night (966)
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.

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  (262): I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole. http://tfl.nu/sdc1
  Replies (9) Good night (1853) Bad night (515)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign

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  (603): Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign http://tfl.nu/pss1
  Replies (6) Good night (1604) Bad night (524)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?

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  (615): Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help? http://tfl.nu/mn7q
  Replies (0) Good night (515) Bad night (881)
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  (750): View more from

  Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."

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  (750): Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on." http://tfl.nu/43jv
  Replies (1) Good night (402) Bad night (435)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.

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  (757): Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand. http://tfl.nu/tvqn
  Replies (4) Good night (496) Bad night (652)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.

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  (404): Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate. http://tfl.nu/nuzb
  Replies (4) Good night (514) Bad night (450)
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  (415): View more from California

  You've created a tinder dominating monster.

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  (415): You've created a tinder dominating monster. http://tfl.nu/1rhe
  Replies (1) Good night (353) Bad night (250)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?

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  (513): It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life? http://tfl.nu/tlmc
  Replies (5) Good night (732) Bad night (229)

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