I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
