In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize