I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize