Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
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