By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
