I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Randomize
