4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
