David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
