the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
