we're blogging at a bar
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Randomize
