therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
In America we eat man semen.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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