no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
