How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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