guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
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