Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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