But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
