O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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