I am in a vortex of obligation.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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