Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
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