He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
