Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Randomize
