Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
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I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
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I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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