She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Randomize
