I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
do herpes really smell.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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