i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
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Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
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We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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