Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
