You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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