Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize
