There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Randomize
