Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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