soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
