Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
