I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
