I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize