She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
