Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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