It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
