sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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