Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
