i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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