I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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