I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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