left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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